Conflict Is an Opportunity WEEK 8 - PART 2

Did you get your worksheet done from yesterday? 

It was full of wonderful and uplifting verses to encourage and strengthen you during conflict. Remember, God wants to grow your heart into a mature Christian. He wants to see you serving others, obeying, and conquering the slippery slope in all that you do. He rejoices to see you act more and more like Jesus especially when you experience tough times or have conflicts in your life. He is always pleased when you call on Him and seek Him to help you walk victoriously through your struggles.


"WHEN LIFE GIVES YOU LEMONS, MAKE LEMONADE"

Today we have a difficult topic to conquer and with it, we will learn that experiencing conflict is really and opportunity in disguise. I looked up this well-know proverb in Wikipedia. Here is what I learned:

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade is a proverbial phrase used to encourage optimism and a positive can-do attitude in the face of adversity or misfortune. Lemons suggest sourness or difficulty in life; making lemonade is turning them into something positive or desirable.

We know that lemons are very sour, but then how does lemonade end up tasting sweet and so refreshing? You can be sure that some sugar was added to the mix to counter-balance the sour in the lemons. And when you have a conflict, where will you get the sweetness you need to take away the sour taste that struggle leaves in your life? 

I hope you find your answer as near as your heart. I pray that you will look to God, pray and read His Word, and hope in His ever-present guidance in your life.

Listen to this week's story about Nacoma and her Mom. You can look at your workbook page 6-2 as you listen to today's story. Click the "Listen in browser" option.

Nacoma's heart is crushed by her circumstance. She is having to deal with the "lemons" of life. She may feel lonely and afraid. She doesn't know what to do. Everything is so mixed up! To whom can she turn for help? She feels she's carrying a heavy burden pressing down hard! (See workbook 6-3.)

If you were Nacoma's friend, what words of encouragement could you give her?

Could you tell her how God is as close as a prayer? Would you encourage her with the news of how much He loves her? Will you reassure her that nothing is confusing or hopeless to God?

It's true! God promises to give us comfort and strength so we can confidently face the difficulties in our lives.

If you are having struggles, cry out to God and tell Him what you're feeling. He understands! Ask Him to work in your heart so that you will not be ruled by fear, anger, or any other sinful attitude. Read His Word. It will guide you to do what is right so you don't add more heat to the situation. Seek advice from God's people. Ask those you trust to coach you to respond to your hard times in a wise and godly way.

CONFLICT IS AN OPPORTUNITY

There are two things that will help Nacoma deal with this conflict in a wise way. 

  • First she needs to understand that she is not responsible for how her parents handle their conflicts. She is only responsible for the choices she makes in this situation. 
  • Second, Nacoma needs to resist the temptation to look at the situation as an enormous burden. Of course, it will not be easy for Nacoma to trust God, stop blaming her parents, admit her wrongs, and learn to share her feelings respectfully. In spite of these challenges, the Bible says that Nacoma should look at the conflict in her family in a positive way. 
Paul from the Bible says it this way:
"So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God--even as I try to please everyone in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved. Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ." 1 Corinthians 10:31-11:1

How can Nacoma glorify God in this situation?

1. With God's help, Nacoma can refuse to let fear and anger control her choices. Instead, she can depend on God's Word and His promises, and trust Him to work in Her parent according to His plan. This will help her to resist the temptation to try to control her parents.
2. Nacoma can pray for strength to obey God's command to treat her mother and father with respect, even when their choices hurt her (Eph. 6:1-2). She can talk to them in a loving way (Eph. 4:15) and resist the temptation to gossip about them (Prov 26:20). She can even seek godly advisors who can listen to her struggles and coach her to respond to this situation in a way that will please God and help her parents (see Prov 12:15, Prov. 15:21-23). Most of all, Nacoma can pray for her parents, asking God to help them to be peacemakers and to reconcile their marriage. (C. Sande, p. 92)

These things will please and honor God and bring Him glory. Bringing God glory is only the first opportunity we have in conflict, as we discussed in depth yesterday.

The second opportunity we have in conflict is to SERVE OTHER PEOPLE DURING CONFLICT.

Conflict doesn't usually bring out the best in you, does it? When you are having a dispute with someone, it is easy to give in to your sinful heart and become angry, bitter, and mean. Thoughts of retaliation instead of plans for reconciliation often fill your mind. Your friends who do not know Jesus will tell you to "look out for yourself." But Jesus says something completely different. (C. Sande, p. 93.)

Luke 6:27-28    NIV
[Jesus said,] “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you."
 
Conflict is an opportunity to serve other people by doing what is good and right. Jesus teaches several ways that you can do this. Look at your workbook, page 6-6. The only thing I would change about this page is that I would put PRAY up at the top. I find it is easier to Love, Do Good, and Bless if I've prayed about it FIRST. 

1. Read through the ways we all can serve others, page 6-6.
2. Discuss them and identify which one is the hardest for you. Find the next clean page and write a short prayer in your notebook asking God to help you with your hardest challenge. Can you think of any Bible verses that apply? If so, copy them into your notebook too.
3. Complete page 6-9 individually, Untangling the Opportunity. (Choose two items for non-readers to complete by drawing a picture.) Remember to start on the right side unscrambling the letters, then draw a line to the left side where it fits in. (Four answers have not yet been covered but can be found on Workbook page 6-7.) We'll check our work tomorrow.
4. Copy your Bible verse into your notebook. (I Cor. 10:31.) See how much of it you already have memorized.

Sande, Corlette. The Young Peace Maker Teaching Students to Respond to Conflict God’s Way, Illustrated by Russ Flint, Wapwallopen, PA 18660, Shepherd Press, 1997.

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