Conflict Is an Opportunity WEEK 8 - PART 3

Who can say the memory verse from this week?

Hint: "So whether you . . ." I Corinthians 10:31

Great job on ALL your memory work!!!! Each of you have always been champs at Scripture memory.


NOW, BACK TO NACOMA AND HER LEMONADE MAKING

In PART 1 we discovered a very upset and confused Nacoma. She said some things to her mom that certainly did not help her situation. But she learned how conflict is an opportunity to glorify God by trusting, obeying and imitating Him. And yesterday Nacoma learned how to serve others during conflict.

Let's look at this further. How could Nacoma serve her parents? Cover the blue words below. Talk about this question and see if any of your answers are below.

Nacoma would need to talk to the Lord (pray) about her feelings of fear, anger, and confusion.

Her only hope is to depend on Him to help her do what is right and good regardless of her circumstances or feelings. Nacoma should confess to her mother that she was wrong to be so disrespectful toward her and blame her for the break-down in the marriage. Nacoma could pray that God will give her a loving heart toward her mother and father. She can express her feelings and concerns respectfully to them in a gentle and loving way. The way Nacoma speaks can bless her parents even if she needs to say hard things. She could encourage them to trust God and obey His Word. She could pray that God would bring healing to her parents' relationship and strengthen their marriage. She could offer to help her parents with their household chores so that they would have more time to work out their difficulties. And if she has brothers and sisters, she could set a good example for them and help them to respond constructively to this situation.

This sentence really seemed important to me:

The way Nacoma speaks can bless her parents 

even if she needs to say hard things.  

Have you even noticed how someone's tone of voice can sometimes overpower what they are saying? If Nacoma's heart is truly loving, even the hard things she needs to say to her parents can be spoken in love and tenderness.

This is glorifying God by serving others!


1. Check your work on yesterday's Untangling the Opportunities. Your page should look like the picture below. If you got any incorrect, double check the Workbook pages 6-5, 6-6, 6-7 for clarification.

2. Copy your Bible verse from memory into the next clean page in your notebook.

3. Ask your Mom or Dad if you can get some lemons from the store and make some lemonade. Here is a recipe: 1 3/4 cups sugar, 8 cups cold water, 1 1/2 cups lemon juice. (That's the juice from about 5 or 6 medium sized lemons. Be sure to leave out the seeds.)

The THIRD opportunity we have in conflict is to GROW TO BE MORE LIKE CHRIST.

Worksheet 6-7 shows what is necessary to become more and more like Jesus. This is God's highest goal for all His children, young and old alike.
  • Recognize Your Need for God - the more you depend on Jesus, the more you will be like Him.
  • Confess Your Sin - to God as well as others you may have wronged.
  • Practice New Attitudes and Actions - overcoming bad habits and developing good habits.

How can Nacoma grow to be more like Jesus? She can admit that she is powerless to change her parents or their situation. She can talk to the Lord about it, (pray) thanking Him the He does have the power the change people and situations. With God's help, she can read and memorize Bible passages that will help her imitate Jesus. When she makes disobedient or disrespectful choices toward either of her parents, she can confess her sin and ask their forgiveness. She may also need to confess to the Lord that she has given in to fear and worry, and she hasn't trusted Him to care for her family. Finally, she can pray that God will help her practice new attitudes and choices that reflect Jesus--like being loving, kind, patient, forgiving, respectful, and obedient toward her father and mother.

This sentence seemed really important to me:

She can admit that she is powerless to change her 

parents or their situation.

This should keep her from undue worry or trying to manipulate the situation. Fear and anxious thoughts are often excuses for disobedience, and it reveals that perhaps Nacoma is trusting more in herself than she is trusting in God. She needs to leave it to God and His power by praying for His will.

WITH GOD THERE IS HELP AND HOPE

When we are in difficult situations, we can give in to fear and hopelessness, or we can run to God, who is called our "strong tower" in Proverbs 18:10. He is "our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble," according to Psalm 46:1. It is God's desire that we call on Him for help, and He will hear our voices, says Psalm 116:1-6.

If you are ever in a situation like the one Nacoma is facing, it would be easy for you to think that you are the only one who can rescue your family from the pain they are experiencing. You might feel guilty and responsible for your parents' problems. You might try to manipulate or control you parents to keep them from making certain choices. You will probably discover that this is a useless effort. You have no power to "fix" your parents. In fact, you need to be prepared for the fact that no matter what you do, your parents may still decide to do things you don't like.

Just like our choices belong to us, our parent's choices belong to them. They are responsible for decisions they make. You can (and should) pray for your parents. You can ask people you trust for advice about how to respond to your parents' problems in a wise way. You can even ask others to try to persuade your parents to get help with their difficulties. But mostly, you need to trust God to take care of your parents and your family. With God, there is help and hope in the most difficult conflicts. No matter what happens, God has promised always to be with you and watch over you.

When we are directly or indirectly involved in a conflict, our responsibility before God is to take the opportunity to glorify Him, serve other people, and grow to be like Christ. And with God's help, we can do just that. (C. Sande, p 95.)

Pray out loud the closing prayer from Worksheet 6-8.

Sande, Corlette. The Young Peace Maker Teaching Students to Respond to Conflict God’s Way, Illustrated by Russ Flint, Wapwallopen, PA 18660, Shepherd Press, 1997.


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