The Five As for Resolving Conflict WEEK 9 - PART 3

Can you sing the 5A song? Go back to the last lesson and practice it a few times before you start this lesson.

"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just 

and will forgive us our sins 

and purify us from all unrighteousness." I John 1:9


Let's talk about how Nikki and Connie can please the Lord and stay on top of the slippery slope by using the 5As to resolve their conflict. Have someone play Connie and make the following statements as if she was taking to Nikki:

First A: "I admit I was wrong to make fun of you about the game last night. I wanted to show off for our friends."

Second A: "I am sorry for embarrassing you in front of the kids at school."

Third A: "I know that what I did was wrong and I need to tell the whole class that I shouldn't have teased you like I did."

Fourth A: "Will you please forgive me?"

Fifth A: "With God's help, next time I will not laugh at you when you make mistakes in softball. I'll try to encourage you instead."

At this point, Nikki would need to say to Connie, "I forgive you." Nikki would also need to use the 5As to confess that she was wrong to tease Connie about her low spelling grades. If Connie forgives Nikki, the reconciliation process will be complete and the girls will be friends again. No wall of conflict will stand between them.


Open your notebook to the next clean page. Be sure to put your name and date on the page.

1. Write 1 John 1:9 at the top of the page. Try not to look and see if you have it memorized.

Now answer these questions in your notebook:

2. How was Connie's admission from today's lesson above? Did she do a complete job?

3. Does Connie need to admit only to Nikki that she was wrong?

4. Who else might Connie need to talk to?

5. Using the 5As, write out an admission that Connie could give to Miss Johnson and the class.

First A: "I admit I was wrong when I _________________________________________.

Second A: I'm sorry for ____________________________________________________.

Third A: "I understand why _________________________________________________.

Fourth A: "Will you please forgive me?" 

Fifth A: "With God's help, next time I will _____________________________________.

6. Complete word search puzzle on Workbook page 7-9. Can you find all five As?

7. Read the closing prayer on Workbook page 7-6 aloud.

As Nikki and Connie use the 5As to resolve their conflict, they will be able to stay on top of the slippery slope. Their friendship will be restored, and they will please God through their obedience. In addition, their good example may help their friends see how to break free from the blame game and quickly admit their wrong choices. Choosing to use the 5As can produce many good consequences! (C. Sande, p 107)

Now for some super important BONUS material.

Here is a video about Saul who later became Paul.

It is important to realize that before Paul's choices and behavior changed, his heart was changed by Jesus. Paul's eyes were literally opened to see that he needed to know Jesus as his Savior. This happened first before God helped him to alter his choices and behavior. 

It is no different with you and with me. First we need to know Jesus as our Savior, then we can depend on Him to help us alter our choices.

Look in your Workbook on page 7-7. It may seem strange that we can actually have a conflict with God, but it happens more often than you might think. Whenever we gossip about or harm others in any way, we have also sinned against God. Then our relationship with God needs to be restored just like our relationship with others. And using the tool of the 5As, we can resolve our conflict with God and be restored to a right relationship with Him.

If you don't have a relationship with Jesus; if you haven't acknowledged your need for Him and accepted His love for you, then you should read through Workbook page 7-8. It is my sincere prayer that you will ask for and accept the salvation that Jesus freely offers to you. Let me know what you decide.

Sande, Corlette. The Young Peace Maker Teaching Students to Respond to Conflict God’s Way, Illustrated by Russ Flint, Wapwallopen, PA 18660, Shepherd Press, 1997.

 

 

 

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